Wednesday, June 13, 2012

WALK

Throughout much of the gospels the front man for the twelve disciples is Peter. He's the one who most often asks the questions I suspect the other eleven were thinking. He's the bold one who sometimes argue with Jesus or makes bold statements he will be unable to support. It could be argued we know the most about him from what we read in the four gospels. Personally, I like Peter but there are times his boldness, his brashness are a bit off-putting, I tend to shy away from those who are similar to Peter. I've noticed something about John's account of the life of Jesus. There appears to be a sub-theme to his gospel, not only is it a story of the Good News of Jesus' life, words and Passion but also the transformation of Peter is told as well. Its easy to find instances of Peter's brashness peppered throughout the four gospels. Also his foretold denial of Jesus is told in much detail in each of the gospels as well. Only John addresses his restoration completing the story of Peter up to that point. John tell us of two appearances by Jesus after His resurrection; one where all but Thomas are present and then the appearance where Jesus settles Thomas' disbelief once and for all. We can assume Peter is present both times but where is he? I can imagine him holding back; his shame, remorse and brokenness have silenced him, leaving him in the background, an unfamiliar place for Peter. Oddly, Jesus lets him remain in the background. The scene shifts abruptly in John 21 to Galilee. Its easy to overlook something important. Galilee is about 70 miles as the crow flies from Jerusalem where the two previous appearances occurred. That is a significant journey, especially when you are carrying a load of guilt and remorse. Imagine our friend Peter walking every step of those 70 miles with his shame. When he finally arrives at Galilee he does what he knows best, he goes fishing. I wonder a bit if he's not decided to go back to his old life, perhaps deciding he's unworthy of the Master's call on his life. Its at this point I wonder if there isn't something for me to learn here. When we sin we often confess, sometimes very quickly. There is nothing wrong with this but this fairly long time for Peter between his denials and restoration may illumine something for me when I fail. Jesus does not want us wallowing needlessly in our guilt and remorse. We do that sometimes thinking it makes us more "worthy" of His forgiveness. Sometimes restoration takes time. Jesus could have called out Peter earlier but He doesn't. Something in His grace and wisdom knows Peter needs the long walk home for his heart to be ready for restoration. This is the first example after the resurrection of how Jesus deals with His children when they do sin. This is significant. Jesus is showing how He deals in generous restoration with the very man He said He would build His church upon. The lesson I see here is there are times I must walk my own road to Galilee in brokenness before I understand more fully Jesus' grace and generous restoration. Peter was not the same man after that breakfast on the beach. He needed the long walk home to prepare for what was coming. There are times I need the same walk home to my Abba as well.