Owner's Manual

In the glove compartment of my holybluemazdapickup is a little book. Its the owner's manual. I've consulted it a few times, finding proper jack points when I've had a flat tire and a few consultations of the fuse schematic when I've encountered minor electrical problems.

I've consulted the owner's manual for my other vehicle, a '97 Dodge Caravan. I wanted to change the air filter and I couldn't find it. I know, I sound fairly inept when it comes to my vehicles. In spite of the fact my dad and now my son were and are mechanics, I have little interest in what happens beneath the hood. Changing an air filter ought to be in the owner's manual, right? Wrong! Tim, my mechanic will have to show me one of these days.

My times with either owner's manuals is "need-driven". Curling up by a fire with a vehicle owner's manual is not my idea of a good read. Perhaps some would think that, but not I.

Some time ago, while still serving on the Elder Board at my church, one of my fellow elders was bemoaning how little time folk spend in the Scriptures. He said something like this, "After all, its the owner's manual". Something in me cringed. The statement, while correct to some extent, falls wildly short. Its almost like saying the ice berg that sank the Titanic was an ice cube.

Staying with that view of scripture denigrates the scope of what Abba has to say. It can't remain a mere "owners manual" if one is to come to know the author. It is so much more. History, law, ethics, passion are found in those pages. For me, I see it as a love letter, God's heart and the starting point of finding His voice as He desires us to hear Him in our hearts.

I am a fairly intelligent person. For the longest time I thought, whenever I would have those "Aha" moments of understanding, that it was a function of my intellect. That notion came to an abrupt end when I stumbled upon the little phrase Paul used in Ephesians 3, "the unsearchable riches of Christ". It brought me up short, humbling actually.

Unsearchable. If the riches of Christ are unsearchable then they need to be revealed; revealed by the Counselor sent, the Holy Spirit. Now I don't mean to infer study is not commendable. Scripture teaches us to study but those "Aha" moments are His voice speaking. I no longer see my intellect as the agent of understanding but rather the Holy Spirit, God's very voice gently speaking. It really is remarkable and has made Scripture come alive, become the love letter its intended to be.

Where to start? It may seem a ponderous tome staring back at you with a whisper of accusation, "You really need to spend some time in me". If you find yourself at that point, I suggest you start with the Psalms. There is so much honest passion in those pages. Most are written by David, a man after God's own heart. He was a deeply flawed man and yet honest in his dealing with Abba. Read, listening with your heart.

Another place to start is the Gospel (good news) of John. Jesus, the Word made flesh, comes alive in that narrative. Listen, don't just read, His questions to those he rubbed shoulders with. It's awe inspiring to listen to His words and stories.

To quote a distant acquaintance of mine, "Listen on, listen well".

Delight

Five years ago this month, I attended my first men's retreat. I flew to Colorado by myself to gather with over 400 other men to attend a Boot Camp put on by Ransomed Heart Ministries out of Colorado Springs. High in the Rocky Mountains God spoke deeply to me. It was a life-changing weekend.

Late that Friday afternoon we all gathered to hear John Eldredge speak for the afternoon session. I was sitting with three other men I'd met about five rows up from the main floor. Early in his talk John asked the question, "Did your father delight in you?" Instantly I felt burning hot anger rise from my toes to the top of my head. I felt like I was going to explode. For a few minutes I tried to remain seated but I couldn't, I nearly ran up the shallow steps to exit right in the middle of the talk. I exploded out the entrance doors and was hit with a blast of icy air. It cooled my anger but I was left with the question, "Did Dad delight in me?"

Sadly my answer was I didn't know. Dad wasn't a mean or harsh man, he simply was removed, detached and unengaged. I never knew what he thought of me, the odd boy he'd been given. I will never know as Dad has been gone for over 11 years now.

Delight. I'd spent some time pondering that word off and on the previous year, specifically as it is used in Psalm 18. That Psalm paints a vivid picture of God's fierce anger as He rescues one He delights in. The word had bitten deeply into me and, I confess, was painful. I'd mostly gotten through the first 50 years of my life with the sense I was tolerated, not delighted in by God and others. As I pondered that word I sensed His still, small voice asking me to allow Him in, to delight in me and show me He counted me worthy to delight in.

Delight. Do you know the Father, our Abba, delights in you?

Zephaniah 3:17 says:
The Lord your God is with you, He is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, He will quiet you with His love, He will rejoice over you with singing.

In His delight, listen for his voice, singing.

Belt

I don't have much of a butt. My dad didn't and as I recall neither of my grandfathers did as well. I suspect I come from a long line of "buttless" men. If I don't wear a belt I'm in trouble all day with my pants threatening a calamitous slide every few steps. No matter how well my pants fit, they will want to succumb to the pull of gravity with ease due to my "buttless" posterior. I NEED a belt, it is not a fashion statement.

No wonder Paul, in describing the Armor of God starts with a belt, the Belt of Truth. I am concerned though about where this desire for truth we have as part of our God-image-ness leads some. The Westboro Church of Wichita Kansas is planning on protesting the nine year old's funeral in Arizona. Harold Camping of Family Radio is buying billboard space in his radio markets proclaiming Jesus' return on May 21, 2011. I've know several folk so enamored by their ability to discern truth that they've become self-appointed "truth keepers" easily correcting others. There is a danger when our pride intermingles with out desire to know truth.

Since truth, the Belt of Truth, is so pivotal if we are to put on the full Armor of God, we need to keep in mind the basics of what might be intended regarding this belt. I think of three fundamental yet broad areas; the truth of who God is, the truth of who He says I am, the truth of who our enemy, Satan, is.

These are broad, general areas that have been written about for thousands of years and it is not my purpose to expound at any length here. What I do want to say is this; the more I learn, the more I discover, the more I live with the author of all truth, the more I am convinced at how little I really know. Paul's little phrase in Ephesians 3:8 "the unsearchable riches of Christ" brings me up short when I think I am "arriving". These riches, these truths are revealed. There is a mystery and wonder in knowing Him and the truth He leads me to that helps to keep deadly pride in check.

I am also reminded that it is not our correctness, our rightness about theology that leads others to Christ. Bashing others with truth rarely brings about the result intended. It is love. Jesus was pretty clear about that in His last talk before His arrest as recorded in John 14-17. The question for me then becomes, what do I do with the truth He's given me?

As I put on the belt, I am humbled by His example, by His words, by His love. I am humbled by how little I really know and how much I need Him to reveal truth to me.

Refuge

This has been a tiring season - not the holidays just past, the season of caregiving I've found myself in. On December 3rd my 87 year old mother fell in her home and suffered several compression fractures of her spine and a fractured elbow. After two hospital stays and a couple of weeks in a convalescent hospital she was released to go home on December 29th.

My mother is a difficult person. I am the middle child of three widely spaced children, my older sister was 16 when my younger sister was born and I am smack dab in the middle. I learned the safest place in our emotionally charged home was to retreat, be as invisible as possible, stay under mom's radar and shield myself at all times. It became second nature.

As I've grown older I learned (perhaps too slowly) to let much of those coping mechanisms fall by the wayside except whenever I am in my mom's presence. The problem now is with mom's pressing needs in recovery, I am with her very often. Due to geography and other factors, my wife and I are the only family members available to deal with mom's pressing needs. I've resurrected much of the old coping mechanisms and I've found myself very tired from the effort. Tired in all aspects; physical, mental, emotional and spiritual. I need a place of refuge.

There are many passages in Scripture Abba could use to offer refuge. My mind easily goes to many of them but He has led me to the passage in Ephesians 6 - the armor of God. Often in these days I have intentionally put them on as Paul instructs Christ-followers to do: belt of truth, breastplate of righteousness, feet fitted with the gospel of peace, helmet of salvation, shield of faith, sword of His word.

As I have done this I have found refuge, a place to rest. Until this season of caregiving, I'd only thought of this armor as pieces associated with the warfare we are all in as Christ-followers. While this is still true, the idea of "refuge" had escaped me. Think of it though, what better refuge than to be clothed with Christ? What better way to be clothed than with His armor? Every piece of it is Christ's, provided for our protection, tailor made to fit perfectly for our needs. Each piece fits me perfectly and is not a burden. They are, in some sense, part of the easy yoke Jesus spoke of in Matthew 11:28 & 29. I have found rest as I loosen my grip on old coping mechanisms and put on Christ.